Sunday, January 29, 2012

They Said She'd Never Sink

My first promise is that I will not be using sea shanty jargon all the time. For those of you who are relieved don't get too excited, I said all the time, not never. I can't resist a good some sea-side salutations occasionally. For those of you who want me to always be speaking in the language of a sailor in love with his fickle mistress the sea, don't think this means I'll be busting out pirate stuff all the time, I'm a classy lady.

That being said, this all has nothing to do with the sea. In fact I don't particularly like the ocean. I think whales are vaguely diabolical and are biding their time before they destroy us all (just ask sea world... too soon?) and that it is quite possible we have already been invaded and we just don't know because they're in the ocean! I mean, who really knows what's going on down there anyway (That's what she said?) I definitely feel a certain sense of kinship with ol' Ahab.

Just call me Ishmael 
That being said, Schmahlo is not a sea gal, but be that as it may, I'm about to go all philosophical in that I am a ship on the great sea of life... blah blah blah. I'm going to leave it to the historians of the future to try and figure this one out. We all know these blogs are like the diaries of tomorrow. I know people who are majoring/majored in history and they are mad about journals and diaries and are always getting on my case to start one. I say I'm just forward thinking and they will all thank me one day for these titillating tidbits of wisdom. 

ON TO THE MEAT (She also might have said that, I promise I'm not planning these). I am on a fierce hunt for a pet. A.K.A. I want a cat. For those of you dog people out there who turn your noses up at cats, you can just go bite it. I LOVE THEM. If a dog loves you big deal, he loves anyone who feeds him, when a cat loves you, you've earned that love. Not to say dogs aren't awesome, if it were feasible in my apartment situation to get a dog I totally would, as well as a cat, but it's not SO CAT IT IS! 

I have done a lot of research on breeds because that's basically all I can do at the moment until a few things pan out *cough*roommate consent*cough* so I've been looking up the breeds that do well indoors and their temperaments to see what kind of cat I would do the best with. The consensus (with myself) is that I want an affectionate, loyal lap cat. One that will love me and only me! But will still tolerate the presence of others. After all it would be awkward for my roommate if my hypothetical cat hated her... I guess

I originally fixated on the British Shorthair cat as my object of desire. Not only do they have some admirable traits such as an easy going temperament, an ability to do well indoors and a loving nature they also have some fantastic JOWLS! 

Jowls I tell you JOWLS!

How awesome is that? I can't think of a better feature for a cat. Also added bonus their health risks are a propensity to run to fat in old age because they are so LAZY! A fat lazy fat that will love me and has jowls. Um I'll take two please. 

Sadly these are highly prized show cats and are way beyond the meager wages of a poor recent grad working part-time so I had to move on. It's okay british shorthair one day you will be mine! 

I am now fixated on the Maine Coon cats! These are also well known for their loyalty to their person. They're huge cats which is a plus (if you forgive the pun) because I like bigger cats, they are just cuter to me, I don't totally know why. They're affectionate and have long fur. These are all beautiful pluses, and as an added bonus they are way more common in the pool of available cats to adopt. 

Can you say no to that face, cause I can't

The only problem really is that I have yet to bond with a cat. These creatures are very particular about their people. If they don't like you the adjustment period is not going to be fun. I had this idea to adopt an older cat because they tend to be mellower and not as high maintenance, but what I've found over the course of a few shelter visits is that these cats are not going to bond with you. They've already bonded with some other person and now you're their second choice. 

Perhaps I've just been unlucky in my quest, and there is a wonderful older cat out there waiting to meet me. I would love for that to be the case, but I think I'm going to have to start looking at the younger cats. I'm hoping that if I start with them young, they will LOVE ME AND ONLY ME! That's the goal, don't forget people. 

My next step is to start attending adoption events at pet stores and see where that gets me. But my desire for a lap cat is growing stronger and stronger by the minute! It doesn't help that I'm constantly on petfinder.com looking up adoptable pets in my area. It's become a minor addiction I'm sorry to say. 

"wilt thou not chase the white whale! art not game for Moby Dick?" - Moby Dick by Herman Melville
 Translation: You should probably follow this blog

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